Wow. It's been soooo long since I've last written. So much has gone on in the past seven plus months, I don't even know where to begin. Since the last seven months of my life have revolved around me being a working mom with a broken heart....Fast forward to today...I've been meaning to write a new entry now that I'm staying at home with Hartley. I'm a Stay at Home Mom now!!!AHHH!!!! =) :::Biggest smile ever:::: Most of you already knew that, but I still just can't get over it. I haven't gotten use to it, even after a whole month. God has truly answered my number one prayer, and that was being able to live the dream I've had since I was a little girl.
The thought of having to go back to work after having my first child never crossed my mind. I also never realized even when it happened, just how hard it would be. I don't know what I would have done without the amazing help from my wonderful mom and her looking after Hartley for me. I think I would have just been so miserable if I had had to put Hartley in day care. I'm so grateful and I feel like I am counting my blessings every day now. I seem to usually only focus on the bad things, as I'm a very pessimistic person who worries 24/7. I really just feel like God had my back...he knew that it wasn't what I wanted, to be working instead of staying at home with my baby, so he made sure that the next best person to mommy was my mommy-- looking after her. Anyways, I just feel like I, now more than ever, know how good I had/have it. After only 7 months of going back to work, God gave me my dream.
It has been complete heaven staying at home. No more work, no more worries about work, just pure 100% mommy all day long and focusing on my little Hart. I love being able to decide what my day is going to look like. I love that I can choose when I want to feed her, where, how, and what. It's the best feeling in the world! Going to the park, playing outside, going on walks, playing with toys and singing songs, I just love every minute of it. I love that I'm with my Hart and not having to be away from her anymore. I just can't believe that it's flown by so fast- the whole first year of her life. She's almost one!!!
Now that I'm at home, I feel like I have no concept of time....I'm so happy and doing what I've always wanted to do that the time just flies by in the blink of an eye! It's weird!!! It's kind of scary though too. Do they really grow up this fast? One minute I have a precious bundle that needs to bed fed through the night and now I have a pretodder, tantrum throwing, almost walking, eight teeth baby girl!? Wow. My life has changed drastically in the past couple years and I just can't wait to see what's in store for the future. I have an amazing little family and we are so blessed. Don't get me wrong, I still have worries and frustrations, and it's definitely not easy---this dream of mine, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. Ever.
To sum things up, life is good...great I should say. I'm so thankful that I have a hardworking husband who is so happy I can finally live my dream. He's definitely an answer to a lifelong prayer and I don't know what I'd do without him. In the meantime, when I do have a little more time on my hands if I can get H to get a good nap in, I've really been getting back into my love of cooking/baking...and painting (the house haha). I definitely want to get back into my artistic interests and love of sketching/painting things as well....but usually I'm so beat after a few hours with H, all I want to do is rest. Ohhhh the life of a mom. =) Thank you, Jesus!
Until next time....
